Archive for September 2010
I’m sure that slab of beef by the nether regions was probably cooked to at least medium by show’s end.
The animal rights group People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals [PETA] is outraged by the raw meat dress worn by Lady Gaga at Sunday’s MTV Music Video Awards.
PETA believes Gaga is trying to keep herself in the spotlight with such stunts and called her dress patently offensive.
ABC News reports that Gaga said wearing the dress was “a protest against the erosion of people’s rights,” and noted if individuals don’t stand up for themselves, they’ll be left with less rights “than the meat on their bones.”
I have no idea who this person is outside of that “Disco Stick” song and I don’t care. She pissed off PETA, so I guess that’s a plus.
Oh, here’s another one-liner: Now there’s more bacteria outside of Lady Gaga than inside of her.
Thank you, I’ll be here all week. Tip your waitresses and try the tortured baby cow. I’m pretty sure there’s a chunk of veal on top of Gaga’s head.
Oh for fuck’s sake.
Last week we saw a Florida Pastor – with 30 members in his church – threaten to burn Korans which lead to riots and killings in Afghanistan. We also saw Democrats and Republicans alike assume that Pastor Jones had a Constitutional right to burn those Korans. But Supreme Court Justice Stephen Breyer told me on “GMA” that he’s not prepared to conclude that — in the internet age — the First Amendment condones Koran burning.
“Holmes said it doesn’t mean you can shout ‘fire’ in a crowded theater,” Breyer told me. “Well, what is it? Why? Because people will be trampled to death. And what is the crowded theater today? What is the being trampled to death?”
And burning a U.S. flag isn’t the same thing? In fact, unless you were in San Francisco or a college/university, I’d wager that burning a U.S. flag on U.S. soil would be more like yelling “fire” in a crowded theater than burning a Koran. Nice try, shitdick.
I guess I might as well talk about the whole “Koran” burning story that took place last week.
What a bunch of nothing.
A few dozen Florida rednecks said they were going to burn a Koran on September 11 and it makes worldwide headlines with even the Kenyan Koffee Fetcher commenting on the issue. This wasn’t that big a story. The best way to deal with a skinhead rally at City Hall is to just ignore them the morning they want to get all “white power” on the Capitol steps. All this media coverage just fanned the flames of these dopes. (Pun intended.)
It’s too bad this group didn’t submerge a Koran in a jar of urine or plaste a picture of Muhammad with elephant poop. That way they could have been eligible for a National Endowment for the Arts grant.
With my collection of several hundred rap albums, I’m surprised that GLAAD and other groups haven’t done more in regards to protesting the homophobia in Hip-Hop Nation. Then again, I don’t think their members would fare well at a Brand Nubian concert.
The Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) is mounting a campaign against 50 Cent after the rapper tweeted threatening comments to blogger Perez Hilton last week, including a violent photo of two men in suits running from a mob.
“Perez Hilton calld me douchebag so I had my homie shoot up a gay wedding. wasnt his but still made me feel better,” read the tweet with the photo attached.
Fitty also Tweeted Hilton: “stop being so sensitive its a joke. Your acting like a big baby” and, “my next song will make your sweet ass dance lol chill out.”
“It’s wrong to make jokes and promote violence against the gay community,” said GLAAD spokesman Rich Ferraro. “Taking down the post is not enough. We wanted him to tell his Twitter followers that what he did was wrong.”
So it’s OK for Perez to attack a beauty pageant contestant because she didn’t give the answer you wanted to hear, but what Fitty said was “promoting violence.” OK then.
A rep for 50 Cent had no comment. But it wasn’t the first time Fitty’s run afoul of the gay community. He told Playboy in a 2004 interview, “I ain’t into faggots. I don’t like gay people around me, because I’m not comfortable with what their thoughts are . . . I’d rather hang out with a straight dude. But women who like women, that’s cool.”
“I’d rather hang out with a straight dude. But women who like women, that’s cool.” Can’t say he doesn’t speak his mind.
His recent Twitter posts have also taken aim at unborn children and pregnant women: “I wanna do something that impact kids in a positive way, thats why im opening an abortion clinic. Ima call it 50/50 chance,” one of them read.
Oh God. I need to get on Fitty’s Twitter account. Then again, I wonder what would happen if he discovered a Twitter account named “KK’s Korner” was following him. My guess is he’d probably laugh and after a few tweet comments he’d want me to hang out with him at the club — I’m straight, after all.
But there’s no way in hell I’m taking that chance.
I’m sure this violates some NFL conduct code. Suspend the whole Jets team for four games. Then again, with how the offense looked against the Ravens Monday, it looks like those guys were punished enough.
NFL boss Roger Goodell was demanding answers Sunday night from Jets’ players and coaches accused of subjecting a female sports reporter to sexist locker room conduct.
As they prepare for their season opener Monday night, Gang Green is dealing with a burgeoning scandal over the treatment of Ines Sainz, a sports reporter for TV Azteca of Mexico, during a weekend practice.
Sainz, 32, a former Miss Universe contestant, complained she was bombarded with catcalls and boorish antics at the Jets’ New Jersey training facility to the extent she wanted to “cover my ears.”
“I’m dying of embarrassment!” Sainz tweeted in Spanish.
Goodell immediately ordered an investigation into the “troubling” allegations, which were addressed in a team meeting Sunday night.
“We’ve had contact with the team multiple times and are moving very aggressively to establish the facts,” said NFL spokesman Greg Aiello.
Jets’ owner Woody Johnson called Sainz to hear her side of the story and assure her the team will “take any appropriate steps necessary to maintain a respectful environment for the media.”
“He stressed to Ines that he expects all members of the Jets organization to conduct themselves in a professional manner at all times,” the Jets said in a statement.
Sainz went to the Jets’ Florham Park practice field Saturday to interview quarterback Mark Sanchez. But while waiting for Sanchez, she was blitzed with reprehensible behavior.
Players and coaches seemed to intentionally overthrow passes in her direction, whistled at her, openly ogled her and blocked her path as she attempted to walk away.
Linebacker Jason Taylor reportedly volunteered for the passing drill in hopes of getting near Sainz. Defensive backs coach Dennis Thurman fueled the antics, tossing pigskins in Sainz’s direction.
Nose tackle Kris Jenkins shouted: “Don’t let her act like she doesn’t know English. She speaks English.”
As the harassment went on, Sainz avoided eye contact with players, tweeting, “I am in the locker room of the Jets waiting for Mark Sanchez while trying not to look anywhere!”
After another female reporter showed support for Sainz, Jenkins yelled, “This is our locker room!”
Sainz defended her appearance at the practice session, insisting she dressed modestly. “Jeans and a white button-up blouse [are] in no way inappropriate,” she tweeted, while posting a photo of her attire.
The incident sparked a complaint to the NFL from the Association for Women in Sports Media, saying, “Women in sports media [should be] treated respectfully, equally and professionally while working in the locker room.”
Here’s the outfit in question.
Gee, an woman with those … assets … goes into a locker room full of football players dressed like that. I’m SHOCKED that kind of locker-room behavior went on in an NFL … locker room.
The NFL doesn’t want incidents like this to happen any more? Then implement a dress code for reporters.
No tight jeans.
No short shorts or mini-skirts.
If the NFL can fine its players for having an untucked jersey or socks that are hiked up too high, then mandating media members to look a certain way should be no trouble at all.
If you take advantage of motorists who pull over to the side of the road whenever an ambulance/fire truck/police car approaches with sirens blazing, your special place in hell is waiting next to the outdoor bagpipe studio.
So earlier today I heard a radio ad for One-a-Day pills. The “spokesperson” was an MLB umpire. This guy was talking about how alert he has to be at his job. His reason for taking these pills? Something like, “In this game I try to get any advantage possible.”
Is that really the right thing to say considering the so-called spokesperson’s workplace?
For the record I take One-a-Days. Regular guy flavor. The “uber energy” flavor has a lot less in the container and they’re all the goddamn thing anyway.
Yeah, I know the generic equivalent is cheaper and you get more of them. I buy One-a-Day in bulk so back off.
So this morning I went to put on my deodorant on all the usual body parts this morning. I was using Gillette’s Cool Wave. Suddenly I realized I ran out with one more arm pit to go. I was out of Cool Wave in the closet, so I went with Storm Force. What’s the difference? I have no clue. And apparently neither did anybody else.
I’ve been a Gillette man for most of my life. I may have tried a few other brands in my youth, but I know I started going with Gillette in high school. However, Gillette has been jacking up the price for their product for a while now, and my supply is starting to run dry. And by “run dry” I mean “only have three more bars in the closet.” This of course means I am out looking for the cheapest price. One problem. What used to be a product I could get for $2 on sale (and then add a $1 off coupon), is now about $4 with a $1 coupon.
Kiss my black ass.
Last week Wal-Mart had Right Guard at buy-on-get-one-free and I had two $1 coupons. Yep. I made the switch.
Now since I’m talking about this subject, I’m not allowed to get Old Spice. Why? The better half’s old man uses Old Spice. This means I can’t use Old Spice. Oh well. Life goes on.
So I’m sending a pair of Terrible Towels to a friend’s two kids. Don’t know what a Terrible Towel is? Don’t ask. The kids are Steeler fans and live out of state. Why am I doing this?
I’m hoping this will get their MILF’s panties wet. I’m that nice a guy. Why am I talking about this? Because if I didn’t mention the backstory, you probably wouldn’t understand why I’m about to post the following conversation. You can figure out who’s who.
“Forgot to mention this. My only rule: Don’t have your kids write any kind of ‘thank you’ note. I hate that shit. I doubt you would do this anyway because you lack almost as much tact as me, but just pretend the Steeler fairy put these under their pillows.”
“Hahahahahahahahha. I’m totally gonna make them do it. But via facebook.”
“I just always thought that was stupid. Kids don’t f’n care and those letters are so phony. It’s like saying ‘thank you’ when you get socks at Christmas knowing full well you don’t care and just want to speed up the process to get to the really big presents under the Christmas tree.”
Well it’s true.
Then: Watching those television shows in which the host says, “Hey look at this place that serves up 5 lb burgers,” and me thinking, “Awesome. I’m so going to that place.”
Now: Watching those television shows in which the host says, “Hey look at this place that serves up 5 lb burgers,” and me thinking, “My God. How can anyone eat that and live?”
I don’t watch those “Man vs. Food” shows all that often, but there’s a college football broadcaster (Todd Blackledge) that does a mini-segment which is similar to this format. Each week he goes to a local eatery in the city whose hosting the football game he covers and shows off some gargantuan greasey glob of artery-clogging goodness.
Of course, “Taste of the Town” doesn’t quite compare to stuff like this on the gluttony scale…
Oh if I was younger I might have a shot at taking on the Big Texan Challenge.
And for the record, the Primanti’s sandwiches aren’t THAT big. Well, except for the Colossal Fish. Then again, I had this after a Black Friday excursion, so 10+ hours of shopping fatigue may have had something to do with my experience with this dish.
I’m not a “beard” person, but this cartoon does hit close to home.
On the rare occasion I get to Day 3 of not shaving the face, I just put a new blade on because I know it’s really going to hurt otherwise.
I like my face smooth as a baby’s bottom, which might explain what comes out of my mouth.
I think the longest I went without shaving was 4 days. Felt disgusting as hell.
Oh if I had the power to transform into other things, I’d turn into a fly and hang out on a wall in Jerry Jones’ executive suite at FedEx field.
WOWOWOWOWOWOW! DeAngelo Hall scores an unbelievable touchdown on a flip pass from Romo to Felix Jones with five seconds left in the half! Jones fumbled and the ball bounces right to Hall and he has a clear path to the endzone.
I think the events at 0:22 and beyond may actually happen tonight.
If Calvin Johnson had Peyton Manning throw the ball to him, the officials would have ruled his catch a touchdown.
Terrible call. Terrible rule.
Jay Cutler had 372 passing yards and threw a late 28-yard touchdown toss to Matt Forte, and the Chicago Bears beat the Detroit Lions 19-14 in the season opener after Calvin Johnson’s apparent TD catch was ruled an incompletion.
The controversial call came with 25 seconds left, after Johnson outjumped Chicago’s Zackary Bowman for what looked like a 25-yard touchdown. Johnson appeared to have gotten both feet down inbound before letting the ball go, but what looked like a game-winner was ruled an incomplete pass by the officials.
That call was upheld by the replay, and after two more incompletions, the Lions walked off the field with their 21st consecutive road loss.
So there is a Facebook fan page thing going around titled: “How many times do I have to say ‘excuse me’ before ‘get the fuck out of my way’ becomes acceptable?”
To answer this question, my policy has always been “Two and then plow through.”
On a similar etiquette note, my five-second rule of holding a door for someone has been in place for at least 10 years and has served me well.
James Madison beat Virginia Tech.
South Dakota beat the University of Minnesota.
Last week Jacksonville State University beat Ole Miss.
The lower-division teams beating the upper-division teams on their own home turf? Crazy.
For the football fans that boo the players should they display any additional signs of on-field solidarity this weekend regarding the potential upcoming league lockout, feel free to go out there, strap on the pads and take years off your own life.
Tony Richardson didn’t watch Thursday night’s game between the Saints and the Vikings. But when he later saw that players on both teams raised a single finger into the air before the game — as a sign of unity with labor uncertainty looming — he liked the gesture.
“I think it was a beautiful sign of solidarity,” Richardson said.
The union representatives on both teams reportedly arranged to do so earlier in the week. Richardson, who is the Jets’ union rep, said he hadn’t yet discussed following suit with his teammates — but imagined they would have that conversation.
The current collective bargaining agreement expires after the 2010 season, and there is a potential for a lockout. The players made a strong but respectful statement Thursday night, and the Jets and Ravens have the chance to duplicate it Monday night in front of a national audience.
“Obviously the owners are showing a sign of solidarity, because they have to stay together through this whole issue just like we do,” Richardson said. “It’s not trying to make a ‘We mean war’ type of thing. It’s more so, ‘Hey, through all of this, we stand together, and we want to support all of our players, past, present and future.’ I thought that was a good way to show that Thursday night.”
I’m not a big union guy, but I don’t blame football players for trying to get as much as they can. And if that means we go without our country’s unofficial national pastime, then so be it. Besides, in a way it would be funny to see the league screw this up. Besides, I’m sure there are other venues football fans can go to get shit-faced.
I’m sure glad to know that my tax dollars are going to fund this government school that shows this kinda smut to the children in my region.
No, seriously. I’m glad. This is funny as hell.
Norwin High School seniors who were expecting a presentation from a Central Blood Bank rep got a surprise Friday when they saw pornography instead.
Channel 4 Action News’ Bob Mayo reported that the Norwin School District sent parents a letter. It said “a few pornographic pictures that were on the representative’s flash drive were briefly viewed” while preparations were being made to show the students a PowerPoint presentation.
“It was hardcore male pornography that was put up on the screen when the flash drive was put in. They tell me it lasted about 30 seconds, which is a long time,” said attorney Peter J. Payne, who has been hired by parents of several students who attended the presentation.
Payne said he will be pursuing some form of civil action against Central Blood Bank.
“The parents are outraged. Every parent that I’ve talked to is very concerned. We’re still talking about the senior class, but these kids are 17, 18-years-old at the most,” said Payne.
“Civil action.” For real? Do I even need to mention that these students have probably seen more forms of Internet porn than me? But I digress.
Student Ethan Dobranski described the sexually explicit images as “frontal male nudity, and there was one with, like, two people in there, but it was, like, from the back.”
“That’s what popped up, but I don’t think he realized that was on there at the time, and he was truly embarrassed for what happened,” student Dan Jones said. “He was just shocked. He, like, put his hand on the stage and covered his head. He was so ashamed of himself for having that.”
“He just looked like a deer in the headlights,” student Zach Hutchins said. “I don’t think he realized what was on there. It was shock. He was kind of ashamed too.”
The school district’s letter called the incident “inexcusable” and said the North Huntingdon Police Department and the Westmoreland County District Attorney’s office have been contacted for an investigation.
A separate letter from the Central Blood Bank said that the person who visited Norwin has been suspended.
The blood bank’s letter identified the person only as “an employee” and said that the person had not followed procedure while setting up the presentation.
“Per organizational policy, employees are not allowed to use flash drives and are required to review their presentations in advance with their supervisor; in this situation, the employee ignored these policies,” the blood bank’s letter said.
This was such a “BIG STORY,” it made one of the lead stories for the local television news stations. There was even at least one reporter standing outside of the school.
Oh, and to deepen my roots in this story, I was also a intern in Central Blood Bank’s communications department back in 1997. In fact, I was manning a promotional booth at a local water park for this place when I first met the future Mrs. kkk.
Once you get to Day 3 of not shaving the face, just put a new blade on no matter the wear and tear of the current blade; it’s really going to hurt so you might as well make it a bearable as possible.
I was watching this game when this play took place. I think my favorite part of it all was when the Reds pitcher turned around to second base as the Rockies player was making his move home. Guess when the crowd started buzzing when the steal attempt began, the pitcher thought something was happening at second base.
Chris Nelson was watching when Nick Masset looked down at the ground.
Talk about a heads-up play.
Nelson stole home in the eighth inning to send the Colorado Rockies to a 6-5 victory over the Cincinnati Reds on Thursday, completing a four-game series sweep and extending their winning streak to season-best seven games.
With one out and runners on the corners, Nelson broke for home before Masset (3-4) threw his first pitch to Miguel Olivo. Inexplicably, Masset stepped off the mound, whirled to his left and toward second base.
“He was just looking right at the ground,” Nelson said. “He wasn’t paying me any attention. [Third baseman Scott] Rolen was playing back. So I just decided I should just go ahead and go. I didn’t stop.”
Nelson scored easily to give the Rockies a 6-5 lead. He became the first player to take home for his first career steal since Dan Uggla of the Florida Marlins accomplished the feat on April 21, 2006, against the Philadelphia Phillies, according to STATS LLC.
Not sure how long this will stay on YouTube, but whatever.
When the highlight of the day is entering the workplace kitchen at 8 am and discovering that some idiot didn’t turn off the left burner on the gas stove top from the day before, you know it’s going to be a good day, Tater. The one highlight? Discovering that if I mistakenly dial a “5″ instead of a “4″ in the help-line I oversee I end up calling an adult hot-line. I found this out while trying to figure out why my 1-800 number was on the fritz.
Fortunately, tonight was “Wal-Mart/Sam’s Club” night, so it was off to feel better about myself.
And feel better about myself I did.
As the better half and I were walking back to our cars from Wal-Mart, there was a woman in her parked car who was repeatedly SCREAMING into her phone, “It’s over between us! Don’t ever come back over!” She then sped out of the parking lot, almost crashing into some poor guy who was innocently backing up his pickup truck that featured a Palin ’12 bumper sticker on the lower left back window. God I love my county.
And to make matters better, my local Sam’s brought back dates. 1,000,000 of them for $5.
So I just heard the Kenyan Koffee Fetcher say the following on a radio show: “The economy right now is like a patient that got hit by a Mack truck and has been convalescing. It can’t run yet, but it’s walking,”
Yeah, and now it’s receiving government health care.
So this morning the better half and I were making our usual workplace commute when we ended up behind the crack-whore niece-in-law and the Access vehicle which was carting her ass down to the local Methadone clinic — 25 miles away from her place. Nice to know that public transportation system is around for a reason. The crack-whore was the only passenger in the Access vehicle, so the State (re: the taxpayer) was paying for someone to drive a useless parasite more than an hour one-way, paying to have this person wait in the car while the parasite got her fix, and paying to drive this parasite back to her taxpayer-funded apartment.
Then the better half got a text on her cell phone from the crack-whore asking why Mrs. kkk “hated her so much” that she couldn’t even wave to her. Please note the crack-whore is currently in a “I’m not talking to anyone because everyone hates me,” phase, so why the fuck would we want to go out of our way to get this piece of white trash involved in our existence?
I really need to change the morning commute route.
So Facebook users are “narcissistic.” I’m sure as hell not narcissistic, though I have every right to be.
Using Facebook is the online equivalent of staring at yourself in the mirror, according to a study.
That’s funny, considering I don’t look at myself in the mirror. Seriously, I don’t. I hate looking at myself so I just don’t bother.
Those who spent more time updating their profile on the social networking site were more likely to be narcissists, said researchers.
Facebook provides an ideal setting for narcissists to monitor their appearance and how many ‘friends’ they have, the study said, as it allows them to thrive on ‘shallow’ relationships while avoiding genuine warmth and empathy.
Oh hell, I avoided genuine warmth and empathy long before I learned of the ol’ FB.
They also tend to use the site for promoting themselves to friends or people they would like to meet, the study concluded.
Well no shit. It’s a social networking site.
Researcher Soraya Mehdizadeh from York University in Canada asked 100 students, 50 male and 50 female, aged between 18 and 25 about their Facebook habits.
ONE-HUNDRED students? Now that’s a sizable study sample. What’s the margin of error — 20 percent?
They all took psychology tests to measure their levels of narcissism, which the study defined as ‘a pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, and an exaggerated sense of self-importance’.
Those who scored higher on the narcissism test checked their Facebook pages more often each day than those who did not.
There was also a difference between men and women – men generally promoted themselves by written posts on their Facebook page while women tended to carefully select the pictures in their profile.
OK, I may find some common ground with this one. There are some people who change their Facebook profiles/photos more often than I change my underwear.
The findings, published in the journal Cyberpsychology, Behaviour And Social Networking, also suggested that those with low self-esteem also checked their Facebook pages more regularly than normal.
This may not be altogether surprising as it is widely thought, however contradictory it may appear, that narcissism is linked to a deep-rooted lack of self-esteem.
Miss Mehdizadeh admitted that not everyone would appreciate her findings.
She said: ‘I think people get sort of defensive about it – like, “I don’t use my Facebook for that reason” – because it’s a label that you don’t want to be slapped with.’
I happily admit I mess around on Facebook more than I probably should. It’s an excellent escape at work when I need to take a quick break from going insane. Actually, I use my status updates as a springboard into my posts at KK’s Korner. I post a quick thought on Facebook or Twitter and remember to write about that subject in more detail when I’m home. Not sure where this falls in the above-mentioned study, but that’s how I roll.
People thought they had a chance with Publishers Clearning House? LOL.
A multistate investigation led by Oregon into whether Publishers Clearing House misled consumers about the chances of winning its sweepstakes has been settled for $3.5 million.
Oregon Attorney General John Kroger said the settlement filed Thursday in Salem requires Publishers Clearing House to boost efforts to inform consumers that making a purchase does not increase their chances of winning.
Kroger said the company, which acknowledged no wrongdoing, also must hire an ombudsman to review mailings to ensure compliance with the settlement.
Thirty-one other states and the District of Columbia are also part of the settlement.
I remember watching Super Bowl XXX with my mom and grandma when a Publishers Clearing House ad got aired. The ad was supposedly a live shot of the Clearing House gang going to someone’s house to hand them a really big check. I turned to my mom and said, “Who actually thinks this is real?” Turns out the reason grandma was with us was because she was asked by Publishers Clearing House to let them know where she was going to be during the Super Bowl when the prize was to be delivered. Then again, this is the same grandma who always played the lottery and often called my mom telling her that she needed a ride out of state because she won some contest.
And I’m moving closer to the front of this line with every passing year. I think when I get to be that age I’m just going to shun all phone calls and emails. Pft. Like I don’t do this already.
Whatever the number of times you are supposed to douse something with those butter spray bottles, you’re probably not supposed to do so many that you lose track of the squirt count.
So on my Facebook page I see people on my friends list from places like N00-Yawk, Cincinnati and Philadelphia giving baseball-related updates on MLB division races.
And what can I bring to the discussion? Well, Pittsburgh Penguins captain Sidney Crosby hit a home run during batting practice at PNC Park.
Having captured a Stanley Cup championship and an Olympic gold medal, Sidney Crosby(notes) is obviously bored with the minutia of competitive hockey. So he’s branching out into Bo Jackson cross-training territory: First with his attempts to shoot pucks through the football uprights at Heinz Field to promote the Winter Classic, and then with batting practice at the Pittsburgh Pirates’ PNC Park on Wednesday.
A batting practice that saw him go yard. Way, way yard.
So what’s a Southwestern Pennsylvania resident to do when it comes to baseball? Well, there’s nearby Washington County, home to the Washington Wild Things of the Frontier League. Currently they are only 38-57 (.400 winning percentage). Compare that to the Pirates and their .338 percentage
And about two hours east of me, there’s the Pirates AA-affiliate known to
many some as the Altoona Curve. What’s their record? Holy crap. It’s 82-60 record. These guys are going to make some fine ballplayers once the Pirates trade them away after a few years.
Earlier this week I went to the local grocery store for my weekly shopping excursion. I’ve talked before about this place going through renovations. Well now the store has a sushi bar. Why?
My redneck of the woods isn’t the most … progressive … place in the commonwealth. But here’s the funny part. The few times I’ve looked in the sushi bar’s direction, I’ve seen nobody but Asians working over at that part of the store.
In the seven years I’ve lived here, I don’t think I’ve seen more than two or three Asians outside of those who work at the local Chinese take-out restaurant. There aren’t any Asians working elsewhere in the store as cashiers or stockers. The hell?
T-minus three days until the re-emergence of the NFL Network’s Red Zone channel. Yes, I’m counting down the days. Even I’m ashamed of myself on this one.
Wait a minute –no I’m not.
For those that don’t know what this channel is, it’s only only from 1 pm – 7 pm and airs nothing but Sunday NFL games across the country. No commercials. I love it. Well, actually, when the 4 pm games come around, the channel goes to some post-game interviews, but that’s OK. I started watching this channel early on last season and after a few weeks I realized how much I preferred this way to watch football. Damn there are a lot of commercials during a football game.
And the better half? She HATES this channel. The first time she spent more than 10 minutes in the living room with this station on she began bitching because she had no idea what was happening. “They go from game to game. How the hell do you know what’s going on?” Guess that contributes to my pseudo-ADD.
The MLB/NBA/NHL networks do similar broadcasts on their stations, as does ESPN from time-to-time. However, there’s a difference between the Red Zone channel and what these other networks do. Having some studio talk, commercials and “bonus coverage” of games is one thing. Spending an entire afternoon going from game to game commercial-free is another thing.
I only turn on this channel 17 times per year, but it’s one of my favorite stations. God bless you NFL Network.
I guess next time this guy gets threatened he should call the ACLU.
He was arrested for protecting his property and family.
But it’s how the Long Island man did it that police say crossed the line.
He got an AK-47 assault rifle, pulled the trigger and he ended up in jail, reports CBS 2’s Pablo Guzman.
George Grier said he had to use his rifle on Sunday night to stop what he thought was going to be an invasion of his Uniondale home by a gang he thought might have been the vicious “MS-13.” He said the whole deal happened as he was about to drive his cousin home.
“I went around and went into the house, ran upstairs and told my wife to call the police. I get the gun and I go outside and I come into the doorway and now, by this time, they are in the driveway, back here near the house. I tell them, you know, ‘Can you please leave?’ Grier said.
Grier said the five men dared him to use the gun; and that their shouts brought another larger group of gang members in front of his house.
“He starts threatening my family, my life. ‘Oh you’re dead. I’m gonna kill your family and your babies. You’re dead.’ So when he says that, 20 others guys come rushing around the corner. And so I fired four warning shots into the grass,” Grier said.
Grier was later arrested. John Lewis is Grier’s attorney.
“What he’s initially charged with – A D felony reckless endangerment — requires a depraved indifference to human life, creating a risk that someone’s going to die. Shooting into a lawn doesn’t create a risk of anybody dying,” Lewis said.
“Indifference to human life.” Where was he — at an abortion clinic?
OK, I’ll just go with “Well weren’t the people who said they were going to kill his family showing an indifference to human life?” Doesn’t quite have the same zing.
But here’s what got me gong “huh?”
Grier said he knew Nassau County Police employ the hi-tech “ShotSpotter” technology in his area and that the shooting would bring police in minutes. Cops told Guzman he was very cooperative.
Oh, and in case you’re wondering what the heck was up with my headline, here you go. Little devils don’t go to heaven.
So the Ol’ Gunslinger is at it again as I type. This means the NFL is under way for another year. This means fantasy football is in full swing.
I don’t do fantasy football/baseball/etc. I’d rather watch a game just to watch the game, not cheer on a team’s slot receiver because if he scores one more touchdown I would just need my running back playing in the 4:15 pm game to gain 50 yards to win this week’s matchup.
Like fantasy sports? More power to you. It’s just not my thing. If anything, I’ll take part in a contest where you pick winning teams. But individual efforts? No thanks.
Sorry. It was there. I had to.
Actor Don Johnson more than doubled his legal judgment against producers of the television show “Nash Bridges” as a judge on Wednesday added $28 million in interest to the sum originally awarded him by a jury.
Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Michael Stern said he was giving Johnson 10 percent in annual interest dating back to 1998, when the performer signed his contract with the production company Rysher Entertainment LLC.
Johnson, 60, sued Rysher in February 2009 claiming he had been denied his fair share of profits from “Nash Bridges” as a 50-percent owner of the copyright to the San Francisco-based cop drama, which co-starred Cheech Marin and ran for six seasons on CBS ending in 2001.
Wonder if Microsoft is aware of Fort Dix?
Microsoft Corp. and the chief rules enforcer for Xbox Live are apologizing to a small West Virginia town and a 26-year-old gamer accused of violating the online gaming service’s code of conduct by publicly declaring he’s from Fort Gay — a name the company considered offensive.
The town’s name is real. But when Moore tried to tell Seattle-based Microsoft and the enforcement team at Xbox Live, they wouldn’t take his word for it. Or Google it. Or check the U.S. Postal Service website for a ZIP code.
Instead, they suspended his gaming privileges for a few days until Moore could convince them the location in his profile, “fort gay WV,” wasn’t a joke or a slur: It’s an actual community of about 800 in Wayne County, along West Virginia’s western border with Kentucky.
“At first I thought, ‘Wow, somebody’s thinking I live in the gayest town in West Virginia or something.’ I was mad. … It makes me feel like they hate gay people,” said Moore, an unemployed factory worker who plays shooters like Medal of Honor, Call of Duty and Ghost Recon under the gamertag Joshanboo.
“I’m not even gay, and it makes me feel like they were discriminating,” said Moore, who missed a key Search and Destroy competition because of last week’s brief suspension. His team lost.
Could this be counted as a … HATE CRIME?!?!?!?!?
How could we talk about you like a dog? I’m sure the First Dog Bo has all his papers in order.
Casual in brown slacks and open-collar white shirt with rolled-up sleeves, the Kenyan Koffee Fetcher took a populist tack in his speech, mixing attacks on Republicans with praise for working-class and middle-class Americans.
He said he’d “keep fighting, every single day, every single hour, every single minute to turn this economy around.” He said interest groups he has battled “talk about me like a dog.”
Every single day/hour/minute. Good
And leave it to Drudge to post the following earlier today.
So Ben Roethlisberger got his six-game suspension reduced to four games. Uh, yay?
Ben Roethlisberger’s suspension has been cut from six games to four by NFL commissioner Roger Goodell.
The Pittsburgh Steelers’ star quarterback met with Goodell early Friday and was told he could return on Oct. 17 against Cleveland.
In that one-on-one meeting, which took place at Westchester County Airport, about 30 miles north of the NFL offices in Manhattan, Roethlisberger was contrite and real, a source with knowledge of the meeting told ESPN’s Sal Paolantonio. Then Goodell informed Roethlisberger that the suspension would be reduced — but that Roethlisberger must continue to avoid any further violations of the personal conduct policy.
The big talk around my redneck of the woods was should the suspension have been reduced even more. I don’t feel he should have been suspended at all, but he was. And the commissioner said that if Ben didn’t rape nobody else that his punishment would be cut by one-third. Ben didn’t rape nobody and he got his suspension cut by two games. That’s the way it was. To think anything different would be foolish.
If this isn’t a wake-up call for Ben to get his shit straightened out then I don’t know what will.
So I had Sir Mix-a-Lot’s “Posse on Broadway” playing on YouTube because I’m too lazy to convert my Swass album cassette to a CD.
And just for shits and giggles I decided to read the viewer comments. I then came across the following from Westrider505″
i think icp’s verisons better its calles posse on verner
I have to…
“I almost died from inhalation coming back from Cedar Point.”
That reminds me I still have to write about my trip to America’s Roller Coast this past summer.
Sure I still have my Gordon Gekko shrine intact somewhere in a bunker 6 billion feet beneath the kkk manor and all that, but Wall Street 2.
Was this REALLY necessary?
“It’s about The Game”? Drat. I never watched that Douglas movie.
So this week’s Cost of Freedom programming on OMGFAUXNEWSLOL2010~!!!! was screwed up on my DVR. Instead of “Bull and Bears,” “Cavuto,” “Forbes on FAUXLOL2010″ and “Cashin’ In,” I got these other stupid shows instead that air on the weekends. What was I thinking recording a block of time because the digital cable channel guide said those shows were going to be aired? And the Saturday morning period of 10 am – noon had some “Cost of Freedom” title on Digital Cable rather than the usual show titles on the channel guide, so that recording opportunity was missed.
What do these assholes want me to do? Watch commercials in real time instead of fast-forwarding through them?
So today was the first weekend of college football, and like I have for the past few years I had games playing nonstop all day.
Now it was past midnight when I had on the Cincinnati/Fresno State game. The game was the most competitive out of the few that were aired in my market and I wanted to watch it all the way through. I then decided to crack open a diet WILD CHERRY Pepsi so I could stay awake until the end. It was at this time when Fresno scored a few touchdowns and the game was out of reach.
Now it’s 3:30 am and I’m still awake.
Here’s the other noteworthy thing that happened tonight. During the Fresno game, Mrs. kkk asked me if the ESPN play-by-play broadcaster was a woman. I said “yes.” Her response?
“Well that’s lame.”
Wow, I’m more progressive than the better half. Now female NFL sideline reporters on the other hand…
What, you were expecting score recaps and my thoughts of Division 1 teams from the SEC getting upset at home by lower division squads? Pft. That’s what real websites are for. Besides, I’m headed off to bed.
So I watched “The Final Destination” tonight. Not to be confused with regular ol’ “Final Destination.” It was what you’d expect it to me.
I can’t remember which of these “Final Destination” movies I’ve seen and which ones I haven’t. They all blend with one another — like the “Saw” movies. I will say this, though. I wonder if movies like this are what trial lawyers beat off to in their sleep. Think about it. Whenever one of these deaths took place, at least 100 malfunctions of various equipment have to take place. If a lawyer could tap into one of these “visions” without being part of the “chain” of deaths, lord only knows how many companies the ambulance chaser could go after.
“You see, your honor. If that screw didn’t get loosened by that motorist which flicked his cigarette onto the road, which caused the Mack Truck driver, who was drinking a cup of scalding coffee prepared for him by the fast-food drive-thru cashier, to swerve into the right lane, which caused the loosened cargo he was transporting to move out of place and graze the bridge, which caused that loosened screw, my client’s daughter wouldn’t have been squashed by the collapsing bridge.”
Awww, that’s too bad. I had no idea who this person was. I still don’t.
Kara DioGuardi is officially out at “American Idol.”
Like rats off a sinking ship.
After months of speculation, Fox announced Friday that the songwriter who joined the Fox singing competition’s judging panel during its eighth season in 2009 was stepping down from her role as a judge.
DioGuardi’s exit follows the departures of judges Simon Cowell and Ellen DeGeneres.
OK, this part cracked me up. Love the placement of these two sentences.
DioGuardi said in a statement that it felt like “the best time to leave ‘Idol.’”
Steven Tyler and Jennifer Lopez are the reported front-runners to join the panel.
Cause and effect?
Someone got hurt during an abortion.
Maryland health officials have ordered two doctors to stop performing abortions after a woman was critically injured during a procedure last month.
The state Board of Physicians ordered Dr. Steven Brigham to stop practicing medicine without a license in Maryland and suspended the license of Dr. Nicola Riley. Police raided one of Brigham’s offices in Elkton looking for medical records, and found dozens of late-term fetuses in a freezer at a clinic.
The Kenyan Koffee Fetcher is right. We will be moving in the “right direction” soon enough.
President Hussein said on Friday he would outline new measures next week to boost the U.S. economy, but analysts were skeptical he would be able to deliver a big enough package to lift growth significantly.
The Muslim Wookie Fucker made his remarks after August data showed that jobs — the central issue in November congressional elections — were being created too slowly.
The White House is under pressure to show tangible results in lifting growth and hiring before the Nov. 2 election, when Osama’s Democrats face punishment from voters anxious about near double-digit unemployment.
“I will be addressing a broader package of ideas next week,” Kenya’s Favorite Son told reporters in the White House Rose Garden.
“We are confident that we are moving in the right direction. But we want to keep this recovery moving stronger and accelerate the job growth that is needed so desperately all across the country.”
Please don’t confuse this with any overwhelming enthusiasm of Republicans taking control of Congress. Shit, I’d be content to just have the Democrat majorities trimmed down. Why? Because if there’s a GOP “takeover” this year, I would all but be certain that America’s Top Imam would get a second term. The Non-Dialect Negro still might four more years even if Democrats still control Congress after November, but I’m afraid if it’s a GOP Congress and a Muslim Presidency then the dumbmasses will be content with this separation of Party powers post-2012. I don’t really give a shit if the Republicans are in the majority after the upcoming mid-term elections; it’s not like Hussein Health Care is going to get axed or that government spending will be curbed.
However, it will be funny to see a 50-50 split in the Senate and see how willing the Democrats would be to “power sharing,” which is something they whined like bitches about back in 2000 when the Senate was evenly divided with a Republican vice president casting any tie-breaking votes. I would also find great hilarity with all the Internet comments bitching about any shift in Congress that prevents the Bolshevik Barbie from continuing her role as House Speaker.
Hmmm, I may be changing my previous stance on this topic…
Before rummaging around your office looking for something someone sent you via snail mail, make sure said person actually sent it.
So earlier today I noticed that Facebook’s “illegal immigrants can stay — deport the juggalos” fan page is gone.
So yesterday I paid a trip to the dentist for a cleaning and stuff. And of course right before I went I brushed and flossed one last time. Yeah, that’ll make all the difference in what the hygienist finds in that yapper of mind. But yet like a dope I perform this ritual anyway.
So what happened? Meh. My top wisdom teeth are going to need yanked. Back in my high school days I was always told by dentists at the time that my wisdom choppers needed pulled. Having seen a few friends go through this ordeal, and noted their misery after each procedure, I always found an excuse not to make an appointment for this S&M. Every six months these people kept saying my wisdom teeth HAD to be pulled and couldn’t understand why I wasn’t feeling any discomfort. This game went on for a few years, then mom got downsized and I kissed bye-bye to my dental appointments.
A few years later I went to one of my mom’s friends who worked at a dental office. As this appointment went on, I was wondering why there weren’t any lectures about why my wisdom teeth haven’t been removed and placed on a mantle. As I was leaving the office, I asked about the condition of my wisdom teeth. “They were fine,” was the response I got.
And thus began my distrust of Big Dental.
I’m not surprised that my recent dentist visit brought back up the “you need your wisdom teeth pulled” talk. Several years ago I was eating KFC extra crispy and I chipped these two wisdom teeth on a piece of extra extra extra crispy chicken. I even remember spitting out the teeth bits. When will I get these teeth pulled? I figure I’ll know when it’s time to call it a day and enjoy the “puffy cheeks” experience; probably be sometime next year.
What did the better half have to say about this? Well, as I gave her the update, our conversation switched over to the subject of me turning into an old man and how I’ll be sporting dentures in the not-too-distant future. Mrs. kkk then made a remark about how me having no teeth would feel weird when she receives … oral pleasures. And as much as I wanted to say, “Bitch, when do I even do that anymore?” I was too busy trying to figure out how the hell she could feel any teeth down there. I mean, if the roles were reversed, this would be a legit topic. But … really? Women can feel teeth down there from her partner? I’m sure if a guy was half-assing his time down there, or just wanted to be a bastard, he could leave an imprint. But … damn. That’s just not cool. I don’t care what the bitch did to you.
Well that was an interest subject change in mid-entry.
Guess this wouldn’t be the best time make a “rinse and spit” remark.
One final note. Mrs. kkk wasn’t a thrilled as I was when after my cleaning the hygienist offered me …
oral pleasures more toothpaste.
So one person on my Facebook friends list posted a cute status update that dealt with the current date and a certain television show which used to air on Fox.
And sure enough the copycats turned my wall into a bunch of “Happy 90210″ references.